Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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