im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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