I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize