He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
