Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
