Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
