ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
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