Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Randomize
