I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
