I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Randomize
