Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
