Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
