I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize