"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
bring money and cleavage
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
