Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
