we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
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