Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize