Christians are straight up FREAKS
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Randomize
