I feel great
I just peed on a car
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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