I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Randomize
