Fine. I'll sleep in my office
At least make sure they are 18
Why
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
