Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
