drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
