i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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