just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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