Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Randomize