Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
