There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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