my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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