Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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