Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
Randomize
