: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I need help removing her.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
