so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Randomize
