Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
