There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
