Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Randomize
