Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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