also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
We had to coat check the pizza.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
