I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Randomize
