Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
