you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
