no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
