idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize
