you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
