My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
