READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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