My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
