i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
How's work?
Spinning.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Randomize