She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
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