So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
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